How Mommy Got Her Groove Back

I deserve a do-over for this past weekend. Ok, maybe a do-over for the whole weekend is a bit dramatic but someone owes me 24-hours back of kid-free bliss. I’m not sure if I had a bout of food poisoning or I’m allergic to being away from my kids (please God, no) but Saturday night had hunched over in an Uber saying “I’m sorry I ruined your birthday!” in a tone reminiscent of Nancy Kerrigan’s “why me” after I asked my best friend to leave her birthday dinner and forgo post-dinner drinks as whatever attacked my body decided the fun bus needed to come to a full and complete halt.

I felt weird early on and knew something was wrong when during dinner I didn’t even order a margarita that had a mini champagne bottle in it. I TURNED DOWN A MARGARITA WITH A MINI CHAMPAGNE BOTTLE IN IT. If you know me then you know that champs is one of my biggest weaknesses and novelty drinks are a close runner up, so yeah, it was bad.

Thankfully I started to feel better by the morning, which I’m sure was a great source of relief to my husband who was not only was concerned about my well-being, but very much concerned about my ability to make my flight and resume my child-rearing duties.

Sudden and brief illness aside, it was an amazing and restful weekend. I had a solid day and a half of fun with my bestie and her awesome friends celebrating her 11th, 21st birthday.  Bonus: I also got to see my aunt, uncle, and cousins who moved to Houston last year. They’re younger – 15, 13, and soon-to-be 7 – so I was pretty excited to be able to show them how cool I was by using Snapchat and letting them know that I was listening to Eminem before they were born.

He said he wanted to "barf a rainbow on my head".

Lars (7) said he wanted to “barf a rainbow on my head”.

Highlights of the trip (all of which outweigh the negative):

  • Had a drink (or two) without wondering if it’s too close to the baby’s next feeding #pumpndumpdontcare
That's my drink with the skull & crossbones. Foreshadowing? Perhaps...

That’s my drink with the skull & crossbones. Foreshadowing? Perhaps…

  • Had an adult conversation without it being interrupted (even if said adult conversation probably included too many anecdotes about my kids. They’re much more adorable with some distance between us)
  • Thoughtfully chose what I wanted to eat for my meals and enjoyed tasting every morsel vs. choosing a menu item that still tastes decent if it gets cold or just avoiding restaurants all together
Chicken & dontuts paired perfectly with a Belini

Chicken & donuts paired perfectly with a Bellini

  • Finished a book that had nothing to do with child rearing or how to get your baby to go the F to sleep
  • Met the dog (and his awesome owner) that I’ve been stalking on Instagram for the past year. But seriously. His cuteness? Come on! He’s smiling at the camera!!


  • Slept. When I wanted to for as long as I wanted to, when I wanted to. No better feeling than waking up at 6am your time and then smiling at the fact that you get to go back to sleep.
  • Best of all: got to spend quality time with my best friend, who is beyond understanding and incredible in so many ways. I can’t even word smith her awesomeness so I’m just going to have to stick with saying I LOVE YOU! murkies

I also:

  • FaceTimed the kids no less than 6 times
  • Texted my husband about 30 times to check-in and ensure the 3-page “Survival Guide” I left was being followed to a T
  • At the airport I teared up when I saw a mom traveling with her two kids because I am pathetic sap like that and well, hormones
  • Almost stole an adorable baby during brunch
  • Smelled my kids in a really creepy way when I finally saw them. If you keep your nose away from the diaper, it’s actually quite pleasant

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